I heard a rumour

There has been talk of a cattery in recent days. And it stinks.

Oh, I know Woman tries to make it sound so palatable (like those darned tablets that have been forced down my throat) by saying I’m off to a spa retreat and “Oh, isn’t it exciting!”. HEY! LADY! Listen up: a poxy 2.5m x 1.5m pen does not a spa retreat make. Not to mention the horribly cramped and frankly mortifying conditions I have to endure on my way there, in that evil cat carrier. Pwah! A pox on you, cat carrier from hell.

And being pen neighbours with a skinny cat called Bombo (you humans must think you’re fucking hysterical, eh?) is not my idea of a holiday, either.

I hope the weather sucks wherever they’re off to...